5 Hisbodedus: Time for Yourself

Hisbodedus is alluded to in various places in the Bible. In different forms it was taught by many Jewish spiritual teachers through the ages. It was given special emphasis by Rebbe Nachman of Breslov. Some of the main techniques that may be used in hisbodedus are discussed in more detail below.

The mark of a successful hisbodedus session is that you should feel good at the end of it. At the very least, you should feel better than before! Sometimes this is achieved through relaxation, breathing, settling the mind, etc. At other times more active methods may be employed, as described later.

The hisbodedus session itself may not necessarily be calm throughout. In one and the same session you may go through a whole gamut of different experiences, from heightened consciousness, insight, joy, gratitude, peace of mind and divine connection to frustration, inner pain, grief, tears and many more. Be willing to face negative aspects of yourself and your life honestly and with the confidence that God can help you discover the good concealed within negativity and darkness. Searching for this goodness will bring you to greater harmony and joy.

Aim to set aside time for yourself every day. This could be anywhere from about ten minutes to as much as an hour, according to your needs. Surely you deserve it!

When and where

If possible, find a place where you can have some privacy. If you are confined to bed, you can practice hisbodedus right there. If you are up and about, choose a quiet corner whether at home or elsewhere. Natural surroundings can be especially conducive to calm and spirituality. If you have access to a suitable natural spot, or even your own back yard, take full advantage of it!

Before you begin a session of hisbodedus, it is a good idea to decide in advance how long you want the session to last, e.g. fifteen minutes, half an hour, etc. Have a clock or timer handy.

Make yourself as comfortable as possible. There is no required posture for hisbodedus. Choose a posture that you find conducive to relaxation and clarity. Many people find it best to practice hisbodedus sitting in a comfortable chair with the back well supported. If you wish, you may stand or walk about. Lying down is acceptable, especially if you are tired or not feeling well. However, at other times lying down is not recommended as it may make you drowsy.

Now you are ready to begin.

Settling the mind

The benefits of deep relaxation are so great that it is well worth spending a little time learning the technique. Initially you may have to concentrate more on bodily relaxation. Once you have mastered this, you will be able to enter the relaxed state virtually at will and have full enjoyment of the mental, emotional and spiritual benefits it can bring.

If you wish, start with a few stretches. If you are confined to bed you can practice relaxation lying down. Otherwise, sit erect with your head comfortably balanced and your eyes closed. Focus your attention on the different parts of your body in order, one by one, from the feet upwards. Which muscles are tense? The key to relaxing is to understand that no effort is called for. Simply let go of tension. If you become restless, stretch and move around a bit, or take a few deep breaths, and then go back to quiet sitting.

To relax deeply, you must also let go of the inner fear, anxiety, anger, resentment and other factors that so often cause people to tense various parts of their bodies. The way to overcome fear is by having faith that everything in your life is in God's hands, and God is good and wants your good.

The active phase of hisbodedus

However, this fails to take into account how hurt, wounded, thwarted and stunted many people are inside as a result of what they have been through in their lives. This is why some people find that when they start meditating, disturbing thoughts and feelings begin to surface, or they feel gray and cloudy and want to go to sleep.

In order to draw out, nurture and actualize the true power of your inner "point," it is not sufficient merely to relax and try to settle the mind. It is also necessary to work on yourself actively in order to overcome inner forces that may be inhibiting this latent power.

After an initial period of quiet sitting, a typical hisbodedus session turns into a workshop in which you contemplate what is happening in your mind, your heart and your life as a whole. Then you actively start working on yourself in order to change and grow.

The power of words

Small children quite innocently express themselves out loud -- to God, to themselves, to invented characters, or to no-one in particular. But as we grow older this easy self-expression tends to become muted, turning into the continual, and often negative, internal dialogs within our minds. Sometimes our innermost thoughts and feelings go underground and may be hidden from our very selves.

Talking to yourself is popularly considered a sign of madness. Perhaps it is when the person is not in control of it. But one of the sanest things you can do to enhance your life is to relearn the art of self-expression and consciously use words to focus your mind, to make contact with the different sides of yourself, to direct yourself and to talk deep into your soul and right out to God.

To whom are you really talking in hisbodedus -- to yourself or to God? The truth is that even when you talk "to yourself," you are really talking to God. Although you experience yourself as an independent entity, at root your vitality as a living being derives from God, as does everything else in the world. All your thoughts and feelings ultimately come from God, even though they are channelled to you via the mysterious entity we call the "self" or "soul," which makes them seem to originate "inside" you.

In order to make changes in your life and grow, you must find new inner power. Fresh energy, positive mental states, insights and original ideas are all new creations that ultimately come from God, the Supreme Source of all creation. In hisbodedus you consciously reach out to God with words, songs, cries and the like in order to channel new life into yourself. When you "talk to yourself" in hisbodedus, you are at the point of encounter between your everyday self and the Supreme Power from which your very life derives.

Don't be embarrassed. You are alone and no-one can hear you. Find your own voice! Don't worry if you feel you don't know what to say. Everybody has this experience at first. Experiment with different kinds of self-expression until you discover those that have meaning for you.

By definition hisbodedus is a highly individual practice. You are completely unique. You must find your own way to connect with your inner "point" and with God. Tailor your hisbodedus to your own personal needs. You may use different techniques at different times depending on your mood and your needs of the moment.

Hisbodedus Techniques

Guide Words

Melody

Affirmations

Guiding Questions

Self-Expression

Cries and tears

Thanks

Requests

Psalms and Prayers

Hisbodedus and Growth

Some people may want to launch immediately into the more active forms of self-expression such as talking directly to God. For others, quiet sitting and contemplation may often be the prime element in their hisbodedus.

No matter where you choose to put your focus, the most important thing is to practice hisbodedus regularly. The effects are cumulative. As you practice, you'll gain experience and learn how to make use of different techniques as appropriate in order to grow and accomplish what you want.

Use hisbodedus as part of your self-healing, or to work on specific problem areas in your life, whether within yourself, in your relationships, at home, in your work, in the wider community, etc. Use guiding questions and self-expression to define and understand your problems and obstacles.

Whether you want to heal yourself, make a change of lifestyle, attitudes, outlook, etc., or accomplish any other goal in life, the goal starts off as an idea in your mind. In order to turn the potential idea into an actual accomplishment, you must first develop a clear understanding of what it is you really want. Next you must work out exactly what you will have to do, step by step, in order to attain it. Then you must actually take the next step.

Hisbodedus is the time to do this work of clarifying your ideas and working out strategies for attaining your goals. The way to do it is with words. Articulate what it is you really want. Try to define the obstacles and difficulties you face. Express out loud your various ideas as to how you can overcome your problems. When you express your thoughts as clearly as possible, you can begin to see where your ideas may need further clarification.

What is up to you to do and what is up to God? Many things are in God's hands alone. All you can do is pray about them -- again and again and again. Even when it comes to the things that are in your hands, you should also pray for help and the strength to actually do them. But when the time for action arrives, it's entirely up to you. The more you articulate your goals in hisbodedus and break them down into small, do-able steps, the easier it will be to take that next step.

The Happiness Workshop

But don't expect release, insight, illumination and joy every time. Even the most assiduous practitioners of hisbodedus go through periods when they feel they are making little or no progress. Despite all their efforts, they find themselves tense, closed up, spiritually disconnected, frustrated, and unable or even unwilling to open their mouths and talk.

This is because hisbodedus is an active endeavor to elevate yourself spiritually. As soon as you face yourself as you really are and start grappling with yourself in order to take your life in hand, you will inevitably encounter powerful resisting forces. Some of these forces may be within yourself, others in the world around you. Often the resistance may become strongest when you are on the verge of a major breakthrough.

Even when you really want to talk to God, there may be times when you can think of nothing to say. At such moments simply say the word "God," or repeat the phrase, Ribono Shel Olam, "Master of the Universe." If you don't know who, what or where God is, or if you feel cut off spiritually, cry out: "Where are You?" If you can't speak, whisper. If you can't move your lips, say the words inside your heart.

There may be times when nothing works, no matter what you try. Sometimes things may be very bad. You may be assailed by negative thoughts. Life is full of pain and trouble. When we start examining ourselves, we may imagine that "nothing is sound from the soles of the feet to the top of the head -- only wounds, bruises and festering sores" (Isaiah 1:6). We may feel that we are faced with insoluble problems on every side, while inside ourselves all we see is pain, frustration, anger, grief and contrition.

The essential work of hisbodedus is to dig and search beneath this surface negativity in order to uncover the redeeming sparks of good that exist everywhere, both in the external situations we face in our lives and within our own selves.

In the words of Rebbe Nachman: "You must seek out the good in yourself. Maybe when you start looking at yourself, it seems as if you have nothing good in you at all. Even so, don't let yourself be discouraged. Search until you find even a tiny modicum of good within yourself. Maybe when you start examining it, you feel it is full of blemishes. Even so, how is it possible that it does not contain even the tiniest amount of good? Search and search until you find some small good point in yourself that will give you new vitality and bring you to joy. And when you've found one good point, carry on searching until you find another... and then another...

"When you search for the positive points and gather them together, each good point becomes a `note' in the melody of life. The music made by all these good points will bring life into your soul, and health and healing to your body. Then you will be able to pray and sing and give thanks to God!"

Doing it!

Sometimes people feel daunted by the idea of sitting down to meditate and pray for twenty minutes. If you find it hard to set a hisbodedus session, try it for just five minutes! Try it for even a single minute! Speak to God honestly for one minute! You'll find you can pour out many prayers even in as little as a minute!

At any time and in any place, you can always take a few moments for hisbodedus. It is always possible to snatch a little time to take a few deep breaths, offer some words of prayer, hum an inspiring melody, etc. You can do this even while washing dishes, standing in line at a checkout counter, or waiting to see a doctor, etc.

As a trial, take ten minutes for your first session of hisbodedus. You can practice hisbodedus right where you are at this very moment. Just decide that for the next ten minutes you are going to practice hisbodedus.

Spend the first five minutes sitting quietly, as discussed earlier. You might focus on your breathing or repeat a guide word such as "Shalom!" in order to settle your mind.

As you become calmer and clearer, you are ready for the second, more active phase of hisbodedus. Take a few moments to thank God for the good things in your life. Say the words out loud, or in a whisper. "Thank you for my life. Thank you for this. Thank you for that..."

Next, use guiding questions in order to become more aware of your thoughts and feelings. Ask yourself, "What am I thinking? What am I feeling? What is on my mind? What is really troubling me?" Ask these questions out loud or in a whisper.

Now start articulating your goals, needs and desires. Talk to God and to yourself about how you can attain them. You could spend five minutes or more on this active phase of hisbodedus. When you are ready to conclude, give thanks again for the good things and affirm your faith in God's ultimate goodness.

The time is now! Put this book aside and make a start!